Did you ever have a bad weekend? Just think what kind of a weekend the disciples had on that Easter weekend. They must have been suffering from a severe dose of depression since Good Friday. Jesus was dead. The crowd that welcomed Jesus with palms as he entered Jerusalem turned against him on Good Friday morning calling for the release of Barabbas and the death of Jesus. The disciples, now afraid of what the Jews may do to them went to the upper room for protection.

This brings up an interesting point that my Jewish business partner David always asks about. (I always let him proofread my sermons and he likes doing it.) I have preached on this Gospel passage several times and David asks “Why were the disciples afraid of the Jews? Why did the writer say ‘the Jews’?” We might be able to say that this was the start of a sentiment to fear the Jews. I still cannot give him an exact answer but I would like you to stop and think of one that you might someday share with me and others.

The phrase “… in fear of the Jews…” is a statement that sticks with me because of its use in the rural south, something I mentioned throughout my three years in Deacon School and now two times since my ordination that I have preached on what some call “Low Sunday.” “In fear of the Jews” might be because the large crowds of last Sunday are gone or could be because we all might be searching for the same answer that the disciple in today’s Gospel is seeking.

I want us to imagine for a moment that we are not here. You may say, “Well, deacon, that is usually what I do during the sermon on Sunday Morning.” I don’t want you to imagine that you are on a sail boat in Lake Michigan, or sitting in your easy chair. Instead, I want us to imagine we are in the room that I read about in John’s Gospel; that each of us is one of those disciples.

First of all, forget that you are in a well-lit room. The room that the disciples were in was dark. The sun was shining outside. It was probably a beautiful spring day, but the doors and shutters are shut tight. You see, today is the first day of the week. Only three days ago Jesus was crucified and you were there. We were all watching as they hammered the nails into Jesus’ hands and feet. After what they did to the teacher, Lord only knows what they will do to us, his disciples. They may arrest us and crucify us like they did him. Remember, we had seen Jesus die but the trouble he started was still going on. Some people just want to stir up trouble, you know. First they killed Jesus and now it appears that someone has stolen his body.

On top of all this fear we are still trying to deal with the grief. Poor Mary who discovered this morning that Jesus’ body was stolen has been doing nothing but babbling on about seeing him alive and thinking he was the gardener. And Peter and John haven’t said a thing since they came back from the tomb.

So the disciples were hiding in the upper room for fear of what the Romans, yes the Romans, would do to them. Then, all of a sudden, they were not alone. Jesus appeared in the midst of them. They probably thought they were seeing things but everybody was staring at him so they must see him too. Then they began to wonder if this was Jesus’ ghost come back to haunt them.

If they had been afraid before, they were probably even more afraid now. Jesus knew of their fear and so the first thing he said was, “Peace be with you.” Then he showed them his hands and side. It was not his ghost. He was alive and he had blessed them! Then Jesus told them to go out into the world. Just as the father had sent him, so he was sending them.

But who could blame our friend Thomas for not believing. He had not been there to see Jesus. I know that if I were Thomas I would have a hard time believing. The other disciples had not believed he was alive when Mary told them she had seen him. Why should Thomas believe just because they were there. A few more people saying the same thing.

Things have not changed that much since then. In some places in the world, Christians still hide from authorities. Most of us can gather freely without fear of being killed, but we still live in a hostile world: a world that ridicules our values; a world that attacks us for the belief in marital fidelity; a world that degrades us because we try to help those who “the world” says are not worthy of helping; a world that crucifies us because we tell it that its lifestyles are sinful and that only Christ’s blood can atone for it; a world that ignores us when we say that life comes after death.

So many times we Christians cower in our churches and refuse to go out into the streets for fear that someone will recognize us and ridicule us for what we are. Like the disciples, we close the doors and shutters tight so that no one well discover us. But Jesus knows our fear just as he knew the disciples’ fear. And so, just as he was in the presence of them in that upper room, he is with us here. And now, just as then, he says to us “Peace be with you.” Do not fear the world outside for I am with you.

As a Deacon my call and mission is to minister to those outside these walls and bring them inside to be guided by our priests and to integrate them into this community of faith. Deacons also aid in engaging the congregation in outreach projects like being cooks and servers in our wonderful Neighbors in Need program. So when your deacon approaches you, watch out because we are hustlers. Yes we hustle you, but it is through God’s guidance that we are called to a servant ministry.

My business partner David asked me as I was starting the three-year deacon school program this lasting question: “so you go to class every other Saturday for three years, four weekend retreats a year at a cost of $1500 a year, and you do not get paid?” I said, “that is correct.” He responded, “why are you doing this?” I said that I have answered God’s call to a servant ministry. God is good and Jesus, having died for my sins, will always be with me.

But that is not all. We are strengthened by Christ’s presence. In our Gospel today there is a curious statement. It says that Jesus breathed on the disciples. In the Old Testament this was referred to when God breathed the breath of life into the first human. So here Jesus is breathing the breath of new life into the disciples. In the same way, Jesus is breathing on us the breath of new life and that enables and empowers us. Jesus is with us. We live in a hostile world. The people outside want to crucify us like they did our Lord, but we are not alone. Jesus is present with all who worship in his name and he is giving all of us new life.

Remember the world outside will ridicule you if you try to live your Christianity outside these walls. They might call you names like a friend of mind who was called “The Church Lady.” They may shun you. Believe me, this has happened to me. Several of my guy friends who live a totally different way of moral life than I do, now feel that since I have become an ordained deacon they cannot be in my presence. To this I say, “it is a shame,” but Christ sends us out into the world to proclaim the good news of his resurrection, but we do not go alone. We go with the power of the one through whom all things were created, with the strength of the one who was raised from the dead and lives forever. Amen.